Front and centre: Don't worry--no one's been injured! OFFICER DOWN is simply a humorous play on words to poke gentle fun at Bruce Kruger, a retired OPP officer, who suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder after years of dealing with death on a daily basis. To give us an idea of how dispiriting police work can be, the Sun describes, in unnecessary, vividly poetic detail, the time Officer Kruger found a dead father and son floating in a lake:
"Bruce Kruger rowed the victims back to shore, the boy was lying at his feet with his dead eyes staring up at him, the father’s body dragging behind the boat with his legs secured with a rope."
Now that's what I call death porn. Officer down, indeed!
Above: I can't make sense of the alliterated gibberish, but I take it that former Leafs owner Harold Ballard's buds aren't as bad as we've been led to believe? Also: the Leafs beat Montreal 4-3 but aren't allowed to play any more hockey this year. Also plus: those lottery winning braggarts are back. Shall we urinate on their mansion?
On the bottom: Blue car at night, sailor's delight!
Summary: Today's cover was perfunctory at best. If yesterday's hadn't been such a masterpiece I would be furious.
** (out of 5)
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