Monday, July 5, 2010

5 July 2010

Front and centre: The Queen of Scotland was in town over the weekend to go to church and watch a horse race with some old college buddies. Ma'am also found time to attend several Pride events, sparking more "is she or isn't she?" rumours. My sources tell me that Thin Lizzy was spotted stumbling around the free Cyndi Lauper concert on Saturday (bombed out of her mind on cider), before making a scandalous visit to the Beef Ball and buying a round of double-ended rubber fists for anyone lucky enough to be at the Priape when she burst through its hallowed doors. Call me old fashioned, but I love the Queen of Scotland!

On Top Of Her Majesty The Queen: For some reason, the Sun has framed this year's Gay Pride parade as a dress rehearsal for a Leafs Stanley Cup victory parade. Ridiculous. A genuine Leafs victory parade would feature far more sodomy.

Beneath Her Majesty The Queen: Eating a Thai chicken wrap at Country Style is just like visiting Thailand . . . if Thailand were full of fat white people on mobility scooters.

Summary: I am pleased to present a random sampling of Sun readers' comments on the topic of Gay Pride. (Note: I take no responsibility for the parade of spelling and grammatical atrocities you are about to witness.) Here we go:

"Is buggery not still a crime?"

"Our law enforcement officers were forced to endue and join this parade, dedicated to pagan ritual ,body worship, sexual depravity,ignorance,diabolical servitude, and abandonment of self worth. I have grave concerns about the permissiveness our city ,provincial, and federal governments have permitted over these past 50 years. Gratuitous living is not healthy."

"We celebrate buggery but can't muster the same effort to celebrate our contry. The priorities in Toronto have gone so far astray that they can't possibly be taken seriously any longer."

"What's worse are some people brought children to this event to see a bunch of people walking down the street naked. To me, that's a form of child abuse. They should be charged. The children will be scarred for life."

"Makes you really want to visit the Toronto cesspool. Maybe the Management of the Sky Dome or Rogers center (whatever you call it these days) could host a gay ball game. Looks like there is lots of degenerates in the city that would go watch it. Just think of the money they could make and utilize an otherwise empty stadium. The umpires would have to be the BUTCHES , Bats could be in the shape of you know anything these fags want to stick in their openings. Come on Toronto lets come up with some ideas for a gay baseball game."


* (out of 5)

1 comment:

  1. Yeh! I love the word "bugger" in all it's glorious conjugations. I also like "degenerate" because it sounds like a slide into primordial goo. Last night I buggered my degenerate boyfriend. Then he buggered me. Cesspool is a funny word too. From Tom.