17 May 2010

Front and centre: The greatest sacrifice a young man can make is giving his life for his country. And when he does, the Toronto Sun will honour him by making an important connection between his death and one of the most beloved sitcoms of the 1980s.

Top: Philadelphia beat Montreal 6-0, Chicago beat San Jose 2-1, and it seems that Kim Mitchell and his wife have won the lottery. Congratulations, guys!

Bottom: Summer Chill is back. Now, if my wife would only follow suit, I'd really be in business!

Summary: I guess it could have been worse... they could have printed WHO'S THE BOSS? or ALF on the cover.

** (out of 5)

10 May 2010

Front and centre: Did you know that the City of Toronto has a secret 25-page book containing the names of elite people who are exempt from paying parking tickets? I've seen the book and here are a few of the shocking names in it:

Moe Berg
Ron James (when he's rantin' and discombobulated)
Lloyd Robertson's son Moyd
Peter Mansbridge's son Moyd
The Dream Warriors
Erica Ehm
Steven and Chris
Steven and Chris' son Moyd†
Robert Munsch (during lunch. He takes his time. He eats a bunch.)
Mary Pickford

Top: The Canadiens beat Chicago 4-1, for the love of God. Also: the $20.6 million winners are back and they've got a revolting case of spring fever. I woke up this morning to find them nude and rude on my front lawn, for the love of God.

Bottom: If my nickname were Summer Chill, I'd be back. Please help me come back.

Summary: I took the weekend off, but nothing happened around the world.

* (out of 5)

† Moyd's paternity is unclear.