Wednesday, January 5, 2011

5 January 2010

Front and centre: Today's cover, with an impressive one-two punch, deals a fatal blow to the institution of marriage and the concept of Jamaica.

Statistics show that fewer young people than ever are getting married these days. At the same time, only 26% of Canadians under 30 believe in Jamaica any more. If these trends continue, the idyllic Caribbean island, known for exporting rum and reggae, will disappear within the next 15 years, like a doomed, intensely homophobic Atlantis. Thousands of DJs will die.

It truly is a nightmare.

Top: Canada's junior hockey team faces off against Russia tonight in Buffalo. Did you know that the Goo Goo Dolls are from Buffalo? It's true. Imagine if the Goo Goo Dolls ran onto the ice during tonight's game and started rocking right on the ice? They would win the entire tournament! Also: today's Lotto 6/49 jackpot is $3,000,000.

Bottom: I could really use a new mattress.

Summary: I'm not one to judge, but I don't think our husband friend understands the idea of R&R.

*** (out of 5)

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